Hidden desires

nederlands

The desires closest to the heart ask for the most careful listening. Sometimes the desires you already know are so big,  that they obscure the little ones.

I like to compare managing desires as managing a large family: all children move independently, but sometimes one gets lost. It still functions well, but the fun of working together is no longer there. The zest for life fades a bit. It’s a bit done to death. Stunned. Dumbfounded.

That has an effect on the whole family. It runs at half speed, it has to draw energy from the other family members, who get stuck in their roles, get into conflict to find fire somewhere.

Thus, looking for the hidden desires is the search for a hidden energy source. You notice that a desire loses its pleasure when a disorder occurs in your energy management: burnout, having a short fuse, having conflicts, being depressed by the heaviness of life, feeling powerless…

Tools for finding Hidden Desires: massages, the dictionary of Hidden Desires. And knowledge of  The Understanding.

From a letter to Els:

“My field of work is not the desires that ask for fulfillment. Not the desires that hurt if they are not fulfilled. Not the desires that you can formulate so that you can work on their fulfillment or ask the universe or someone else for them.

My field of work is the desires that prove themselves, because – despite explicitly not striving for fulfillment – they still get their moment of fulfillment.
So that doesn’t require looking ahead. It requires looking back at what has become true. That’s why I always ask about what exactly happened. What words have been said. What deeds have been done.

These are the desires that people have developed a distorted view of over the course of their lives. Because the shaping of desire has not been purely demonstrated. Because those who did it before couldn’t carry it. Couldn’t carry it full.

It is about points – moments – that have become loose and long to be part of lines again. Because you are the connecting observer.

It’s about things for which you, and only you, can choose the unique shape. Because it simply exists in life and because no one was able to set a good example for you. Always reluctantly. Always against resistance.

And always awake. Because it is and remains extremely necessary to see all the details. So you know where it can be even more pure. Even more the way you can carry it, wear it even. As a unique representative of the line. Because the desired line, once connected in its elements, helps carry you along.

In our correspondence I found the moment again when the Happy Child fell off the wall. And how, the moment you wrote it to me, I suddenly knew that I could continue along the lines of my brothers and sisters’ story. How I didn’t know for years how I got home and that at that moment I could suddenly see it. It wasn’t because you wrote it, but it coincided with the moment you wrote it.

I’m dancing on lines again…

Een nieuwe vertaling van relaties en wat die met zich meebrengen.